Almost at the end of work term.
For the past 4 months, I feel like accomplish nothing.
Useless and pointless.
The only task I have assigned myself was to prepare for the exam and then pass the exam.
I was not paying attention too much at work most of the time. I told myself I should study for the exam and that is why I don't need to work hard. Because I have something more important than it. But... It turns out I can't even do just one thing right.
After the exam, I feel lost and empty. Don't know what I would do and what I should do.
The past 4 months are empty to me. Nothing important has happened in my life. I do not focus. I do not work hard. I achieved nothing. I am worthless.
After yesterday's ride with Brad, I feel even worse. His daughter finished her undergrad in 3.5 years and will be starting working for Google in May at the age of 20. My feeling is complicated. I have never thought about working in a software company. And the past few months' brainless work does not motivate me in any kind. I even feel that I do not fit in this so-called "tech industry", However, the conversation I had with Brad (poorly communicated though) got me thinking. No matter what I do or what I want to do. All I can do right now is to enrich myself with knowledge with life. I should put one hundred percentage into life then start from here.
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